Engineer Humor

"vicariousILive" (vicariousILive) 10/30/2014 at 08:21 • Filed to: Ohfudge

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spanfucker retire bitch > vicariousILive 10/30/2014 at 08:22

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Lololololol.

luvMeSome142 & some Lincoln! > vicariousILive 10/30/2014 at 08:28

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How about another one?

What do you call a beautiful woman on an engineer's arm?

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.

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a tattoo

Hahayoustupidludditeshutupandgohandcrankyourmodeltalready > luvMeSome142 & some Lincoln! 10/30/2014 at 09:11

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BURN.

jesuschrysler-geo-cpt-planet > vicariousILive 10/30/2014 at 09:47

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What is the difference between civil engineers and mechanical engineers?

SVTyler > luvMeSome142 & some Lincoln! 10/30/2014 at 09:48

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vicariousILive > jesuschrysler-geo-cpt-planet 10/30/2014 at 10:26

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mechanical engineers have jobs?

jesuschrysler-geo-cpt-planet > vicariousILive 10/30/2014 at 10:50

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Ha. I was going to go with civils make targets and mechanicals make the weapons, not quite as dark.

gogmorgo - rowing gears in a Grand Cherokee > luvMeSome142 & some Lincoln! 10/30/2014 at 13:46

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Two engineers were biking to work when one asks the other, "Where'd you get such a nice bike?"
The other answers, "Well, yesterday I was walking along when all of a sudden a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, tore off all her clothes and threw them to the ground, stood there completely naked and said 'Take whatever you want'".
The first engineer replies, "Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn't fit anyway."

luvMeSome142 & some Lincoln! > gogmorgo - rowing gears in a Grand Cherokee 10/30/2014 at 13:49

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I forgot about that one!

davedave1111 > gogmorgo - rowing gears in a Grand Cherokee 10/30/2014 at 14:06

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An engineer crosses a road when a frog calls out to him, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."

He bends over, picks up the frog and puts it in his pocket. The frog speaks up again and says, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week."

The engineer takes the frog out of his pocket, smiles at it and returns it to the pocket.

The frog then cries out, "If you kiss me and turn me back, I'll do whatever you say!"

Again the engineer takes the frog out, smiles at it and puts it back into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asks, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, I'll stay with you for a month and do whatever you say. What more do you want?"

The engineer says, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool!"

davedave1111 > jesuschrysler-geo-cpt-planet 10/30/2014 at 14:07

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Civil engineering is boring... Mechanical engineering is making the drills.

*bdum-tsh*

jesuschrysler-geo-cpt-planet > davedave1111 10/30/2014 at 14:43

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I can dig it.